"Love is patient; love is kind.
Love does not envy; is not boastful; is not conceited;
does not act improperly; is not selfish;
is not provoked; does not keep a record of wrongs;
finds no joy in unrighteousness, but rejoices in the truth;
bears all things, believes all things,
hopes all things, endures all things."Some people are surprised to learn that this beautiful passage is from the Bible. Actually, it is an excerpt from an entire chapter of the Bible, referred to by some as "The Love Chapter" (chapter 13 in the book of I Corinthians), with this excerpt being the most popular portion of the chapter spoken at weddings. Despite being in the Bible, this passage is so popular that I've not only heard it read aloud at non-Christian weddings, but even at weddings where neither spouse is a believer in God.
I thinks it's great that this passage is so popular even at these kinds of weddings. But I wonder if either marriage partner actually thinks that he/she believes they can be consistent at living out more than a couple of these characteristics over a long period, especially if the true source of love - God's spirit, or the Holy Spirit - isn't living within them? So although it's nice for a couple getting married and their audience to learn about the characteristics of what true love really is, living it out is very difficult - even for Christians.
In my previous post on this topic, I mentioned near the end how true love is choosing to stick with and support a person and deciding to serve the needs of that person. In other words, it is a selfless act of service to another person, even when it's inconvenient and even painful. Now I didn't just pull these observations out of thin air. "The Love Chapter" is but a small taste of what the "Book of Love", i.e. the Bible, has to say on this subject. So no, I'm not some kind of 'love guru', but I'm merely relating concepts recorded in God's word (the Bible) by the source or originator of love, God Himself.
So where am I going with all of this? Well, since the Bible is authored by the source of love (men did the actual writing, but God revealed to them what they should write), then it should contain the best and most comprehensive examples of what true love is and how we should live it out - whether we're believers in God or not. In other words, what's the point of having a passage read like the one above on a wedding day with no follow-up on what it is and how to live it out? An understanding of this could save many marriages from disaster.
I'm sure most people have heard the phrase, "God is love" (I John 4:8), and the Bible is filled with examples that prove this. Here is what God's Son, Jesus Christ, has to say about the ultimate gift of love to mankind:
"For God loved the world in this way: He gave His Only and Only Son [Jesus Christ], so that everyone who believes in Him will not perish [spiritually] but have eternal life." (John 3:16)So God's gift of love to us is being able to live forever simply by believing in the One He sent to earth for us, His Son Jesus Christ. One definition I've heard of "believing in" is putting the full weight of your trust in someone or something, in this case in Jesus Christ in order to save you from the penalty of your sins: eternal punishment/damnation.
But later on in the same book of the Bible, John's Gospel, Jesus gave a command to his disciples during the last meal He ate with them before his crucifixion:
"This is My command: love one another as I have loved you. No one has greater love than this, that someone would lay down his life for his friends. You are My friends if you do what I command you." (John 15:12-14)There's so much that Jesus tells us about His love for mankind in this passage, but the main thing is that the greatest act of love one can do is to die for someone else. We've all heard this in many love songs and poems, but it's one thing to tell someone you'll die for them and entirely another to actually do it! Well, Jesus actually did it, but not just for the sake of those disciples that He was eating with at the time, but for the sake of everyone who has ever lived.
By voluntarily being nailed to a Roman cross and dying for the sake of all humanity, Jesus performed the greatest act of love in history. I'm sure that other people throughout history have sincerely given their lives in order to save the lives of others, but only Jesus' death meant something beyond this life: if Jesus didn't die in our place to pay the penalty of our sins, NOBODY would be acceptable before a perfect, holy God and therefore nobody but Jesus would be able to enjoy an eternity with God after their bodily death. Jesus' death was the fulfillment of God's love for humanity. There is certainly no better example of sacrificial love than this!
Now that we know what true love really is and who the source of it is, let's relate this to how we should live it out while here on earth.
As I alluded to before, a person is truly incapable of loving another person apart from the help of God's Holy Spirit living within them. And the Holy Spirit only comes to live within a person once they've been cleaned or forgiven by God. How is this done? Again, believing in Jesus to forgive you of our sins is all it takes: no religious rituals, no regular church attendance, no amount of trying to be clean or perfect, no amount of giving or serving. If you've done all this and not asked Jesus to forgive you of your sins, you'll be one of the flabbergasted and horrified try-hards that Jesus describes in Matthew 7:21-23!
So does this mean that only Christians - those with the Holy Spirit living within them - are capable of expressing true love? No, but it's a whole lot harder to express it without Him living within you! I guess my real point here is that Christians have a much better understanding of true love because they've read many examples in the Bible of what this is and how to live it out. I'm not saying that Christians are much better at living it out - God knows how selfish people professing to be Christians have withheld love and even harmed others throughout history. I'm just saying that Christians should know better because they've been exposed to so many teachings about it.
Even if you're a non-Christian or non-believer, learning to better express true love to others involves opening your mind to some of the lessons in the Book of Love, the Bible. You don't need to read or believe the rest of it, but the following passages might be of help in learning how to express true love to others:
"Husbands, love your wives, just as also Christ loved the church and gave Himself for her" (Ephesians 5:25)In other words, husbands need to express love for their wives in a selfless, serving, sacrificial manner. I'm pretty sure that God would want wives to likewise love their husbands.
"... husbands should love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hates his own flesh, but provides and cares for it, just as Christ does for the church, since we [Christians] are members of His body." (Ephesians 5:28-30)I've always chuckled as I read this verse, because Paul here is playing on the vanity of men. Come on guys, I'm sure most of you have struck a pose in the mirror many times! You've either checked out your hair or looked at what effect a workout (hopefully) had on you. But all this passage is saying is that you need to also get your eyes off of yourself and onto the love and care of your wife.
"To sum up, each one of you is to love his wife as himself, and the wife is to respect her husband." (Ephesians 5:33)Even though these last few passages have been geared toward married couples, it is my hope that believers and non-believers have been encouraged by learning about true love and how to live it out with all people, not just their spouse. There's no question that our world would be a drastically better place if each one of us would strive to show just one act of true love per day.
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